Comments for Bitsy Dungaree

Comment on Love Me, Love Me, Say That You Love Me by Allison

Allison — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 08:22:36 +0000

Yay. I’m glad I’m not the only one whose mind runs in circles about these matters. I’ve been getting little shredded inside from getting too close to a person who, by your definition, fills the soul mate function in my life right now. I can agree with the statement that it’s too much to be with that person forever, but, my question is, how is it ever enough to be with anyone else? A poem I’ve been thinking about this week, as response (and perhaps counter-argument) to your blog:
“Failing and Flying”
by Jack Gilbert
Everyone forgets that Icarus also flew.
It’s the same when love comes to an end,
or the marriage fails and people say
they knew it was a mistake, that everybody
said it would never work. That she was
old enough to know better. But anything
worth doing is worth doing badly.
Like being there by that summer ocean
on the other side of the island while
love was fading out of her, the stars
burning so extravagantly those nights that
anyone could tell you they would never last.
Every morning she was asleep in my bed
like a visitation, the gentleness in her
like antelope standing in the dawn mist.
Each afternoon I watched her coming back
through the hot stony field after swimming,
the sea light behind her and the huge sky
on the other side of that. Listened to her
while we ate lunch. How can they say
the marriage failed? Like the people who
came back from Provence (when it was Provence)
and said it was pretty but the food was greasy.
I believe Icarus was not failing as he fell,
but just coming to the end of his triumph.

Comment on Love Me, Love Me, Say That You Love Me by Paul Maurice Martin

Paul Maurice Martin — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 22:25:28 +0000

I think you’re on the right track - thinking about exactly what love is. People usually bundle together a lot of different things into that concept, it seems to me - some of which don’t really belong there.

Comment on Don’t Ask by seekatedate

seekatedate — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 07:14:01 +0000

P.S. - I tagged you in my blog. Please read the second to last post on mine to find out why.
Sorry I had to.

Comment on Don’t Ask by Katie

Katie — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 00:23:56 +0000

This is good stuff Betsy.
And because I have so many friends who are actors, I often instead ask people, “What are you passionate about?” instead of “What do you do?”

Comment on Don’t Ask by Libby

Libby — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 03:59:17 +0000

I find it ironic that there is such an intense double standard in our society regarding actors and actresses. Those precious few that “make it big” are paid disproportionately well and are socially deified to Olympic proportions (Hollywood being this modern day Olympus housing its gods and demi gods in coutoure loving starlet form)… and the many left over are looked upon with scorn and derision as wasters and free loaders.

I can sympathise. I feel a similar tug of hesitation when telling people “I am an aspiring author/illustrator of children’s books”. Even though I am deeply proud of what I am doing and I love every aspect of exploring stories played out in literary and or visual form, I hate being asked that question because inevitably, the immediate question following is “have you been published?” I feel as though my aspirations are suddenly rendered invalid the moment I say “no”. It’s like I’ve already failed. Most people just don’t seem to understand how one can work their wee hineys off and not have much money or stature to show for it.

To most, career is black and white: you’re employed or you’re unemployed. You’re worthwhile or you’re worthless. And yet, you can’t get anywhere in the arts without putting in this time of aspiration and “pro bono” work. And there lies the paradox. So I guess until you and I “make it big”, we’ll just have to keep blushing as we face our shame and embrace the choices we make and the humble paths we’ve decided to pursue so that we can admit unabashedly that we are, in fact, artists.

Comment on Don’t Ask by Eric Rodriguez

Eric Rodriguez — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 21:29:12 +0000

Dear B.,

It sounds like you hate being misunderstood more than you hate the actual question. Maybe next time somebody asks, you should take advantage of how unspecific it is, thusly;
Stranger: So what do you do?
Bitsydungaree: I explore the human condition which fascinates me so by using the gift God gave me. How about you?
Stranger: I examine the extremes of human tragedy and misfortune and look inside myself to assign a commercial value to pain, suffering, irreparable loss.
Bitsydungaree: I’m actually and actress.
Stranger: I’m actually an insurance adjuster.

Yours, -Eric Rodriguez

Comment on Remember When… by Karly

Karly — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 14:47:27 +0000

So many memories, so little time…

1. Running in to the corner of a counter and my dad sawing it off out of anger

2. Watching Mr. Rogers right as an earthquake happened.

3. Riding my aunt’s great dane

4. Needing to use the restroom in preschool, but not wanting to because there were no doors on the stalls.

5. Being the nap monitor in kindergarten. i got to wake everyone up!

Comment on Don’t Ask by Ellen

Ellen — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 14:12:01 +0000

I enjoyed reading this post. Your understanding of how you were made is refreshing. One of my brothers has the same hesitation when asked what he does. He’s a pastor and talk about stereotypes or killing a conversation once he tells :0)

Comment on Let’s Not Put a Label on It by Patrick

Patrick — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 16:37:37 +0000

I think it is possible for someone to be strong in faith without having Christianity label or pigeon-hole them. We all have things that we are or that we do. These things, however, don’t need to be a definition. They are just aspects of the greater whole.

I am a husband, an actor, a soon-to-be father, a Steeler Fan, a liberal, a student, and many other things, but none of them alone describe me.

I think this is what Bits was getting at in her post. She may be the uber-Christian, but when I think of her that isn’t even the first thing that comes to mind, and since she never pushes her faith on anyone but herself it sort of blends into the background of the wonderful human being that she is.

Comment on Let’s Not Put a Label on It by bitsydungaree

bitsydungaree — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 07:53:38 +0000

Well, Libby, let me just say that (a) I suppose the exception proves the rule, and (b) you are smarter than me.

That said, I think it is important to make the distinction between the boundaries implicit in the Christian faith and the boundaries that come along with the Christian “label.” The “label” of Christianity might say that I shouldn’t drink or wear a low-cut top. Hell, in the eyes of many, the Christian “label” says that I should be judgmental, close-minded, and a hypocrite. These things have nothing to do with the limits designed by our Creator to guide us on a path to actualizing the potential that He set within us.

The boundaries that God gave to help me live my life to the fullest are, in my mind, not the same as the limitations that I allow to be put on myself based on a label by which other people perceive me or (even worse) by which I want them to perceive me.

That is a short answer to a very big question.

Can you please comment such interesting and thought-provoking things on all my blogs? You will make me smarter simply by figuring out how to answer you!

Also, can I say how refreshing it is to hear a non-believer acknowledging that “said boundaries [are] meant explicitly to help [us] grow into the full, complete human being[s] God intended [us] to be?” I am so often frustrated by people who, even within the church, aren’t able to grasp that the guidelines we’ve been given by God are there to liberate us, not to hinder us.

Thanks for being so smart and wonderful!
xo